Believe in yourself!!

There will be haters, there will be doubters, there will be non-believers. And then there will be you, proving them wrong.

This is a long journey and you have to face a lot of it alone. People will come and go. They are all phases. Whatever happens, whoever enters your life, it is all destined, and all of it teaches us a lesson.

Life is like a roller coaster ride. There is sorrow, pain, heartbreak, love, laughter, happiness - all the emotions. There is excitement, thrill, action, drama. But the one thing you have to remember is not to lose hope!!

Life is a beautiful journey. If one wrong thing is happening right now, don’t quit. Greet it with a big smile. Half the problem is solved right there. Just give it a try.

The shocking truth

The shocking truth of life is that we ourselves make our problems worse. Trust me on that.

The problem is never big or small. We are the ones who make it easy or tough for us. It is all in our mind. We all go through so many common problems - some deal with them easily, and some just sit back and cry instead of finding a solution.

I want to be careful with this, because I have seen this idea used badly. It is not true that every problem is imaginary, and it is not true that people going through genuinely hard things simply chose the wrong attitude. Some situations are objectively awful and no amount of framing changes them.

What is true is the second layer. There is the thing that happened, and then there is the story we tell ourselves about the thing. The first one you often cannot touch. The second one is almost entirely ours, and it is usually the heavier of the two.

“I lost the job” is a fact you have to deal with. “I lost the job because I was never good enough and I never will be” is a story you added, and you have been carrying it around as if it came with the situation. It did not. You wrote it.

Where believing in yourself actually starts

People imagine self-belief as a feeling - some warm confidence that arrives and makes everything easier. Mine has never worked that way and I do not think it works that way for most people.

It is closer to a habit of not abandoning yourself. Doing the thing while unsure. Speaking to yourself the way you would speak to a friend in the same position. Noticing the voice that says you can’t and carrying on regardless, without waiting for it to go quiet first.

The voice does not go quiet. That was never the deal. You just stop treating it as the final word.

Give it a thought

So don’t be afraid or upset if something is going wrong. It is happening to make you strong for what is coming.

Start thinking about it differently and watch what happens: life is not as tough as we think it is. It is a very beautiful ride. All we need is a positive approach towards it.

And the haters, the doubters, the non-believers - most of them are not thinking about you nearly as much as you imagine. They said the thing once and moved on. You are the one who kept it, repeated it, and gave it a permanent room in your head.

You are allowed to evict it.

Where it starts

If you take one thing from this, make it the second layer.

The next time something knocks you sideways, separate the two parts. What actually happened, in plain words with no adjectives. And then what you have decided it means about you.

Write both down if it helps. The first list is usually short and manageable. The second is usually long, dramatic, and almost entirely invented on the spot.

That is where the real weight is. And that is also the only part you can put down.

Give it a thought!!