It’s not the stress that kills us, it is our reaction towards it.

In times of great stress, it is always best to put your anger and your energy into something positive.

Most of the stress people feel doesn’t come from having too much to do. It comes from not having finished what they already started.

That is worth sitting with, because it explains why a busy day can feel light and a quiet one can feel crushing. It is not the volume. It is the number of open loops - the unfinished things your mind keeps checking on in the background, none of which are progressing, all of which are costing you attention.

Finishing three small things you have been carrying for weeks often does more for how you feel than a whole restful weekend.

The greatest weapon against stress is our ability to choose one thought over another. It is always a good idea to do something relaxing, and doing something productive is a genuinely effective way to relieve emotional stress.

Always remember: the time to relax is when you don’t have time for it.

Most of it never happens

The harsh reality is this: if you treat every situation as a life-and-death matter, you will die a lot of times. So why worry about what may never happen?

Don’t let every difficulty stress you. They are there to make you stronger. Fight back and come out better for it.

Worrying does not take away tomorrow’s troubles. It takes away today’s peace.

Refuse to stress about things you cannot control or change. Be a bit like a child about it - no stress, no worries.

Most of your stress comes from the way you respond, not from the way life is. Adjust your attitude and a surprising amount of it disappears. And don’t spend your stress on people who do not deserve to be an issue in your life at all.

The vast majority of what we worry about never happens. That is not a reason to feel foolish for worrying - the mind is doing what it was built to do. It is just useful to know the hit rate before you hand over another evening to it.

Stress and passion

There is a difference we all need to understand: working hard at something you don’t care about is stress. Working hard at something you love is passion.

The hours can be identical. The exhaustion is not.

Do your best and don’t stress yourself. Be grateful for the small things. The people in your life should be reducing your stress, not generating more of it. Stop focusing on how stressed you are and remember how fortunate you are.

A lot of stress arrives when we try to control our experiences rather than move through them. And a great deal of it comes from living to please other people - running a life designed around approval you can never quite secure.

I should be clear about one thing, though. Anxiety and depression are not simply the result of pleasing others or of thinking badly. They are real conditions with real causes, and if they are what you are dealing with, please talk to a doctor. Attitude helps with stress. It is not a treatment for illness, and treating it as one keeps people from getting help far longer than they should.

Let it go

You must learn to let go. Make jokes, forget the stress, live and move on.

Sometimes the best thing you can do is not think, not wonder, not imagine and not obsess. Just breathe, and have faith that things will work out.

Discover what you are good at, follow it, and much of the stress dissolves on its own. When you finally see how much of it was self-generated, you will laugh.

“Don’t stress the could haves. If it should have, it would have.” - Anonymous

Never stress about what already happened. Live in the present and make it beautiful. Keep a positive approach. Learn to be happy with what you have and stop complaining about everything.

And most importantly: have patience.

Remove the people, things, beliefs, environments and memories that cause you stress, and you will live a happier, more peaceful life.

“Stress is caused by being ‘here’ but wanting to be ‘there.’” - Eckhart Tolle

**–**Kashish