When Life Gets Hard: Keep Moving Forward, One Step at a Time!!

Most of us will experience hard choices, stressful events, and difficult situations that will impact us in one way or another for the rest of our lives. Hard times happen. They teach us lessons and make us stronger. In bad times, we try to numb ourselves from the pain and reality of the situation. We want to bury our heads in the sand and pretend everything is fine as if these bad things aren’t happening to us. But eventually, you have to face it head-on. There is no other way. There will be times of great heartache when you are forced to make life-altering decisions in which your mind and emotions will play opposing roles. But remember, nothing will happen right away. It will take time, and you will travel from one emotion to another and then back again. These things cannot be rushed.

In such a given situation, keep asking what you’ll do next, how you’ll continue moving forward? This will move you from a fearful, stuck mindset into a more productive mindset. The best lesson we should learn is that we have to keep our focus on the people who stick around instead of the ones who bail. Look forward to the sunshine. After every storm there is calm, and then the sun shines. If you keep remembering that, you will make it through. Give yourself the opportunity to feel and process every thought and emotion. This is what the experience calls for. We all know what happens if we bypass or bury our emotions. We must allow the process to happen and give ourselves space and time to feel everything.

Everyone gets into a funk sometimes! When those feelings strike and you find yourself demotivated about what you’re trying to achieve, it can be really tough to move forward. Remember, your life is under your full control, and no one else’s! After all, you know what’s best. So get in tune with the sense of trust you have in yourself. Chances are you are looking at your future life through filters of fear and failures from your past. And this is what is holding you back from truly moving forward.

You need to realize that your past is exactly that, the past. This doesn’t mean that you should try and make yourself forget about your past. Because, firstly, it is pretty much impossible, and, secondly, the past has still taught you some valuable lessons. What you need to do is to let go of the negative emotions and limiting beliefs, so that they lose power over your future. Of course, it is sometimes easier said than done but no harm in trying right? Small steps take you on long journeys. Break your biggest task down into lots of little sub-tasks and do at least one of them today. Even this act can help you feel like you’re moving forward and can make intimidating tasks seem manageable.

It is important to find out what one big thing is holding you back. Everyone has something. Usually, when you know what it is and when you get rid of it, all the other small things get out of your way much easier. So ask yourself this, if you could change one thing about your life, what would it be? That’s the one thing you should work the hardest on. And don’t worry if you’re having trouble locating that one thing.

When other people’s opinions are more important than your own you live life on their terms and not yours. You will NEVER have what you truly want in life unless you learn to shut out other people’s opinions. Sometimes we need to put on our blinders. Stop looking at what everyone else is doing. Keep your eyes on your own paper. Seriously, everyone’s journey is different. So no one’s life will look the same. Comparison is something that will drive you batty.

So what do you do when you have people in your world who suck the positive mojo right out of you? You set boundaries – that’s what! Set boundaries with those people who have been squashing you under their judgments and opinions and it will instantly help you feel better about yourself! Ultimately this is YOUR life. Stop letting other people’s opinions control your happiness. The truth is, you can’t change a controlling person. You can only change the way they interact with you, by giving them a different YOU to respond to – someone who refuses to let other people’s opinions control your happiness.

Take responsibility for yourself. If you don’t want people to nag or control you, don’t put yourself in a situation that allows it. Strive to always keep your word. If you can’t fulfill a request, or you don’t really want to, then don’t agree to it. This is key: learn to control yourself, so others aren’t forced to do it for you. Most of the time, when you’re worried about what other people think, you’re projecting your own fear, embarrassment, or self-judgment based on comparisons between your life and that of others.

Ultimately this is YOUR life, your journey. You’re the one who has to be happy and satisfied with how it’s lived. As Steve Jobs said, “Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life.”

-Kashish